“Siri”
“What can I help you with ?”
“play Lucie”
“by Wings for Louise?”
“yes”
I was getting into the nostalgic mood, being the last day of the year. I lay a plate of cookies and a tumbler of gin by the table opposite the window overlooking the park. The weather was at its coldest today and I loved it. There was so much to be thankful for, so much to work on, so much to grieve, so much to learn from. Taking a swig of the gin, I let it play on my tongue while taking the music in, slowly. It burned, the gin that is. The song itself was soothing. This was quite a year.
I had flown across the world to find greener pastures, with a great job, an apartment with a great view, I had no responsibilities to anyone but myself; What else could I have wanted?
Rhetorical, but there was something I still wanted. Somethings I had sacrificed to get here. I must admit it was selfish, but here we are regardless. The distant laughter of friends down below was like salt in this wound. The memories played on like this wonder piece by Wings of Louise. I took another sip.
I will get tired of torturing myself, you would think. I would drop these broken pieces and stop looking for ways to cut myself, you would hope. But here we are for the fifth time today with the same memories, in the same position.
“siri”
“yes?”
“play Melodie”
“by Florian Christl?”
“yes”.
A bird flying past the window was enough to bring me to reality. Odd considering they had all migrated for the winter. I took this as a sign; something feels different. Should I sit and write? Scroll through tinder, meet someone for the night, it’s almost the new year so I should probably take a break from that. Speaking of which, there are some habits I should drop as the new year begins; new year, new me you know?
I decided to take a walk, destination not known, but I wouldn’t mind getting lost into the new year. A new year in a new year place wasn’t a bad idea.
“siri”
“yes?”
“play reflections, piano version”
“by two lanes?”
“yes”
I switched from the speakers to earphones and stepped out.
a story from 2022 that made more sense in 2023 but posted in 2024.
50 claps for the new year, I’d appreciate that. Also share, goes a long way
